During the winter, I put most of my time, effort, and money into creating a baseball team for myself and my friends to play for since the previous years team was disbanded. I realized that with the players we had, theres no reason why we shouldnt win atleast 5 or 6 games out of the 15 or so that we play.
But so far, the season hasn't lived up to everyones expectations and I feel that I let everybody down. We are 0-6 now, and have been mercied 4 times. I feel like I have failed, not just myself, but everybody on the team who put their trust in me. My gf, family, and even some people on the team say that I am too hard on myself but I have always been like this because whenever I try really hard on something, I screw up somehow. This has also affected me as a player, and I haven't nearly played as good as I have last season.
How do I gain more confidence in myself and not be so hard on myself? I realize that baseball is just a game, but cant keep from feeling like Ihavefailed
By: nmoney99
About the Author:
But so far, the season hasn't lived up to everyones expectations and I feel that I let everybody down. We are 0-6 now, and have been mercied 4 times. I feel like I have failed, not just myself, but everybody on the team who put their trust in me. My gf, family, and even some people on the team say that I am too hard on myself but I have always been like this because whenever I try really hard on something, I screw up somehow. This has also affected me as a player, and I haven't nearly played as good as I have last season.
How do I gain more confidence in myself and not be so hard on myself? I realize that baseball is just a game, but cant keep from feeling like Ihavefailed
By: nmoney99
About the Author:
…..At your level, winning is NOT the most important goal or benefit of baseball. People learn about themselves when striving in competition. They grow and mature. It can even prepare them to succeed in careers.
Also, it’s physically a joy to participate. And it’s socially valuable…the friendships you make….unless you make the mistake of focusing on winning and losing.
My advice is…prepare well for games, then play as well as you can. Win or lose, everyone can look themselves in the eye and say, “We gave it our best to win, but the better team won. We honor them for that. But it was great to be here today and do this together.” And then go have a beer.
If you take this proper perspective on team sports, you won’t experience the negative feelings you describe.
The first time you swung a bat as a kid, did you hit a home run? I would guess, no. So why would you expect to put together a winning team the first time you tried putting together one?
You cannot tell yourself to be confident. Competence will breed confidence. You must become competent at the skill you want to have in order to be confident. You must be willing to make mistakes and learn from those mistakes. Most successful people are successful because they learned from either their mistakes or other peoples mistakes.
In your case, you may have picked team members based on skill levels but did not take into account how these players would play as a team. Team building is a skill. You may learn from that mistake, learn some team building skills through books and trial and error, and apply this knowledge next year. That is the process of becoming confident.
It is important to note that each new skill or unfamiliar task you face will require a similar process. You need to work to achieve competence in that skill before you become confident.
Remember to have gratitude for every experience and not shut out any feeling that you have. You will grow stronger, smarter and kinder.